Are you currently dealing with betrayal in your life and feeling as though you’re at the end of your rope? Have you been feeling stressed out or anxious because of this situation? It’s understandable. If you’re dealing with a betrayal, it’s going to cause a lot anxiety. That’s why it’s so important to practice self-care to help you get through it.
Self-Care Reason #1: You Need Energy
Understanding your partner’s betrayal and navigating the consequences of that action takes a lot of energy. It’s hard, almost impossible, to block something like that out of your mind as you deal with the realities of daily life and the anxiety you're experiencing. Practicing self-care will put fuel into your tank and give you the energy you need to keep going and better cope with your anxiety.
Self-Care Reason #2: You Have Other Obligations
As mentioned above, the realities of daily life mean that even though you are only able to focus on the betrayal, you still have to deal with the obligations in your life. Obligations like:
Going to work
Attending school
Taking care of your children or other family members
Responsibilities you have in your house of worship, with other organizations, or in the community
Life doesn’t stop because of a betrayal. That’s why being able to practice self-care is important so that you can keep “all of the balls” you juggle in your life in the air.
Self-Care Reason #3: Your Family Needs You
Unfortunately, the betrayal you experienced also impacts your family, especially your children. They are going to have a lot of questions and concerns and will need your guidance. It makes sense that you want to devote all of your energies to making sure that they are okay. However, you can’t do that unless you are taking care of yourself too.
Self-Care Reason #4: Isolation is Not Good for You
Dealing with betrayal can be isolating. Have you caught yourself saying:
No one understands what I’m going through.
I feel so ashamed about what happened.
I have to be the one to deal with this.
I just want to be left alone.
Betrayal is a very hurtful experience and you may feel embarrassed or shamed because of what happened to you. Isolation, however, only makes things, including your anxiety, worse and cuts you off from people and resources that can help you.
Self-Care Reason #5: Understand Your Feelings
You need to take care of yourself as you attempt to understand this betrayal, as well as while you're coping with all of the feelings associated with it such as anxiety, stress, low self-esteem, etc. No one likes to take a hard look at the painful emotions they're experiencing. Yet it’s necessary in order to understand your feelings, cope with them, and hopefully find closure.
Self-Care Reason #6: Process Your Emotions
One way to process your emotions is to talk to a therapist. A therapist can help you better understand your feelings and emotions and will help you cope with them. Processing your emotions is much better than:
Bottling up your emotions inside you
Allowing them to come out at inappropriate times
Using substances to “numb” your feelings and push them down
Processing is a big part of the self-care process and also for finding recovery from betrayal.
Self-Care Reason #7: You Have a Life to Live
Dealing with betrayal can make it seem like everything in your life has frozen. You feel emotionally stuck and are focused on what happened. However, you have a life to live. Self-care keeps you from going “numb” and letting things slide by.
Dealing with betrayal is something that nobody should have to experience. Yet, it does happen to many people. Instead of letting betrayal get the best of you, practice self-care. It won’t take away the pain and hurt but it will make it easier to get through the days and the weeks ahead.
Click to learn more about infidelity counseling and treatment with Naomi Casement - LMSW.
