Although Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about reaffirming your love for each other, for many it is quite stressful. What should I get for my partner? How will they react? Pressure keeps you from actually enjoying the day. However, you can find ways to put those high Valentine’s Day expectations aside and focus instead on your partner.
Avoid Materialistic Gifts
One way to cope with high Valentine’s Day expectations is to focus less on materialistic gifts. Although that necklace or expensive tie looks flashy, do they really represent how you feel? Your love for each other is much deeper and meaningful than that. Therefore, rather than focusing on an expensive gift that you think they might like, focus on what’s more meaningful. You’ll find that your preconceptions will fall away and all that is left is what really matters: love.
Focus on Experiences vs. High Valentine’s Day Expectations
The opposite of materialistic gifts is rewarding and fun experiences. These are more meaningful for several reasons:
They are more engaging and interesting.
Experiences are more fun.
You both have a chance to focus on each other and do something together.
The memory will last longer and mean more than a materialistic object.
Plus, an experience that both of you enjoy will help you feel more at ease. Experiences help to reinforce the bonds of a relationship and make it stronger.
Don’t Compare with Others
Are your friends all talking about what they are getting for their partners? It’s not surprising that you might then be comparing yourself to others. This can create doubt and make you second-guess yourself. However, this would be a trap. You know your partner better than anyone else. What is it that they like and enjoy? You need to focus on your partner, not what everyone else is doing.
Take a Break
Is the pressure from having high Valentine’s Day expectations so great that you are starting to feel overly anxious? If so, then it’s time to take a break. You shouldn’t have to feel stressed on a day that is meant to affirm your love for each other. Consider these ideas:
Go for a run or bike ride
Listen to relaxing music
Practice some breathing exercises
Do light stretching
Remember, Valentines’ Day is supposed to be a positive experience, not nerve-racking. If you are experiencing anxiety symptoms it’s time to take a break and refocus.
Turn Off Your Phone
While you’re at it, turn off all other electronic devices that could be a distraction too. Many find it hard to stay in the moment without their attention being drawn away to the latest status update. If this sounds like you, take a holiday from your devices and shut them down. Your partner will appreciate this because you are demonstrating that your relationship is more important than the distractions. When you are more present it will allow you to feel less stressed and more engaged enjoying Valentine’s Day with your partner.
Ask What They Want
What a concept! Instead of trying to guess what your partner would like for Valentine’s Day, why not just ask them? Even better, plan out something that you would both enjoy together and what to get one another. That way you will know that your partner will enjoy their gift. Also, planning out and implementing an activity will be much more rewarding and affirming for the relationship too.
Valentines’ Day doesn’t have to involve high expectations. It’s supposed to be a day that you celebrate with your partner focusing on your relationship together. By trying these ideas, you can avoid Valentine’s Day expectations and instead cozy up to what matters most: each other.
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