When you have experienced trauma it feels as though there are different parts of yourself inside you. They are tugging and pulling you in different directions. And, when reminded of your trauma, these parts swing into action to “protect” you. Yet, in reality, they are only causing more harm than good. Instead of finding healing, you experience more torment through negative coping mechanisms such as drugs, alcohol, or anger.
It is only by releasing your true Self that you are free. This is the process of internal family systems and it can help you cope with past trauma.
What is Internal Family Systems Therapy?
Internal family systems therapy is a form of psychotherapy that considers the different parts or systems in each person. When you experience trauma, these parts are working out-of-sync. The idea is to better coordinate these parts so that it becomes possible to address and resolve the trauma you are experiencing. There are four components to internal family systems therapy. They are:
Managers
Exiles
Firefighters
The Self
The Role of Managers
When you think of a manager you envision someone who directs and even protects others in their care. For example, the manager of a hotel is responsible for the people who are occupying the rooms. Managers tend to take care of other people and sacrifice their own needs. The same goes for you. You have an internal manager(s) whose job it is to protect your consciousness from harm. In this case, the harm comes from the memories and emotions connected to a trauma that you have experienced in your life.
How Exiles Function
The negative memories and emotions are called exiles. These exiles are locked away in the different parts of your brain. That way they are unnoticed and hidden from your consciousness. For example, have you ever heard of someone who has experienced a trauma, but has difficulty recounting the memory? That’s because their managers have taken those exiles and hidden them away. Yet, what happens when those memories come to the surface?
The Response to Exiles: Firefighters
Firefighters are the response for when those traumatic memories come to the surface. When that happens you become crippled with emotional and perhaps even physical pain. What do you do to cope? You use drugs, drink alcohol, or participate in any number of negative coping mechanisms. The idea behind the firefighters is that they put out the “fire” of those memories by dousing them with things such as drugs and alcohol.
The Self and Internal Family Systems Therapy
Finally, there is the Self. The Self is the part of you that keeps you grounded. It has several qualities such as:
Compassion
Perspective
Confidence
Compassion
The Self is the part of you that is able to recognize the pain you are going through. Yet, it has the capacity to help you through this issue, without suppressing the emotions. In fact, the Self has leadership qualities that allow it to step forward and push the other conflicting parts to the rear. The encouraging part is that everyone has this Self inside themselves. It may be hidden by the managers, exiles, and firefighters, but it is there. The goal of internal family systems therapy is to identify these other competing parts and to allow the Self to come forward. Doing so helps you heal from the trauma that you have experienced.
Internal family systems therapy is a novel way of looking at how people struggle with issues such as trauma, and can find resolution. By identifying your managers, exiles, and firefighters you can locate and empower your Self. Finally, by doing so, you'll find the healing you need.
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